Current mood:

sleepy

Perhaps now would be a good time to clarify some things.
I am not suicidal. I don't really even know how it happened. I woke up this morning, and the bottles were empty. I looked all over the place to see if I had maybe removed them from their bottles and stashed them somewhere else. I found one Ambien on the floor. The next thing I did was immediately go into the bathroom and try to throw up. Nothing happened, though. I think I was just really trashed and crying and sick of it all and wanted to go to sleep. In any case, I'm very lucky that I'm not sick. Just very very sleepy. I've been sleeping all day. John has woken me up periodically to feed me. I spoke to Christy earlier, and my hope is I'll get all my sleeping out tonight and then wake up tomorrow and book a flight.
Sorry I keep doing stupid shit. I'm just a little too careless for my own good.
I'm going back to sleep, now.